Last year I shipped a major update to XLNavigator.

It was a big milestone. Months of work. Real progress.

I closed my laptop, walked to the kitchen, made a sandwich, and sat alone.

There was nobody to celebrate with. No team to high-five. No office champagne (or even office). Just me, a sandwich, and a vague sense that something was missing.

This is the loneliness nobody talks about.

The Isolation Reality

Solo founding is, by definition, solo.

No coworkers to vent to. When something frustrating happens, you sit with it alone.

No team to celebrate with. The wins happen, and nobody's there to witness them.

Wins feel hollow alone. Achievement without shared joy is incomplete.

Losses feel heavier alone. Failure without support is crushing.

We romanticize the independence. We don't talk about the isolation.

Why This Happens

Several factors compound:

Remote work compounds it. No office, no casual interaction, no water cooler.

Your problems are niche. Non-founders don't understand why a 10% conversion rate matters or why that launch failing hurt so much.

Friends and family don't get it. "Just get a job" isn't helpful. They mean well. They don't understand.

You're busy—too busy for community. Building is all-consuming. Relationships feel like luxury.

The Danger of Isolation

This isn't just about feeling bad. Isolation has practical consequences.

Decision quality drops. Without outside perspective, you miss things. Echo chamber of one.

Motivation fades. Momentum requires external energy sometimes. Alone, motivation is self-generated only.

Perspective disappears. Is this problem huge or am I spiraling? Hard to tell without someone to ask.

Burnout accelerates. Isolation plus stress equals breakdown.

Finding Your People

You need community. It doesn't require a team, but it requires people.

Online communities. Indie Hackers, Twitter founder circles, Discord servers. People who get it.

Local meetups. Even occasional. Coffee with one other founder. Monthly dinner with peers.

Mastermind groups. Small, committed groups that meet regularly. Accountability plus support.

Founder friends. DM people. Meet for calls. Build one-on-one relationships.

What to Look For

Not just any community. The right community.

People at similar stage. Someone with 100 employees doesn't understand your problems. Someone also figuring it out does.

People who understand the struggle. Not cheerleaders—people who know how hard this is.

People who will be honest with you. Not validation—truth. Even uncomfortable truth.

Building Relationships

This takes effort. Intentional effort.

DM people you admire. Scary but effective. Most people respond.

Offer help before asking. What can you do for them? Lead with generosity.

Show up consistently. Communities reward regulars. Be a regular.

Be real about struggles. Vulnerability creates connection. Pretending everything's great creates distance.

The Permission to Not Be Alone

I want to say this clearly:

Needing community isn't weakness. It's human.

Humans are social—even introverts. We need connection. Building alone doesn't mean being alone.

Connection is part of the work. Not a distraction from it. A requirement for sustainability.

You can be a solo founder without being a lonely founder.

But it takes intention.

Related Reading